Seeing the Girl My Ex Cheated With

Saturday mornings are my happy place. I attend a barbell strength-training class at the gym. After my break-up, I joined the gym and created a new routine for myself - running and the gym. There was something therapeutic about taking out all my frustrations through lifting weights or speeding through paths in a park.

Last Saturday, however, turned out to be a little different. Gyms become little towns. You tend to get to know who is who at the hours you go to the gym. Why is this? Because people are creatures of habit. As such, they will go to the gym around the same times usually on the same days. On this particular day, I noticed two new women walking in. One of them held the door open for me as I walked in. She looked at me as she held the door open, and she froze.

Initially, I didn't pay much mind to her and said a simple "Thanks" after she held the door open for me. Then, it hit me. It was HER!

It was one of the girls that my ex had been running around with behind my back. He had a hidden social media account. This was one of the girls from that account. No wonder her face froze. The bitch knew exactly who I was.

She and her friend walked towards a different section of the gym, towards the cross-fit area. I felt slight relief. Even though it's been two years, I didn't really want to see her face. I went to the room where the class was being held and started to set up my area. I was happy that I had arrived early and could have my choice of equipment as well as space.

After I had set up my space and started stretching, she came in with her friend. They looked around, and unfortunately, the only two spaces available were in the area in front me. They set up. I took the opportunity to look at her. She was shorter than I was, much shorter. She was also a little chubbier than I was. She also appeared to be younger - maybe mid-twenties.

As the class began, I must admit - I made sure to outdo her on every freaking exercise. Even when I thought my legs, arms, or abs were about to explode from burning, I kept pushing myself.

She was high maintenance - she was constantly texting on her phone throughout the exercises. What on earth was so important that she had to text in the middle of weight lifting?

As the class went on, the less I cared about her. I was fascinated to see the person that my ex ran around with, but today, does it matter? It really didn't.

As I drove home, I recalled all of the hurt I went through back then. I remembered screaming at my ex, "You will never touch me again!" I remember thinking that all the dreams I had for us were shattered. She knew exactly who I was when it was happening. This made her behavior just as bad, but it's not up to me to get back at her for what she and my ex did.

That's Karma's job.

Blast from the Past

Facebook did it again. Periodically, Facebook displays "People You May Know." For those not familiar, it's people that Facebook has identified as someone you might know based on common acquaintances, phone numbers, or any other things on Facebook algorithm. This time, it identified what I initially thought was my ex from law school's wife. Observe: 

Complete with baby. I was disgusted initially, but happy to see him happy. He and I had always been friends. We dated, it didn't work out, and then he got engaged years later to someone else who could give him what he wanted. After his engagement, he stopped calling, and I stopped calling. It just made sense. Then I get the friend request: 

Same name, different Facebook profile picture. I was appalled. Why would she send me a friend request? I decided to go into stalker mode. I learned that the profile name was actually their baby's name. After reading some comments, I discovered that it was actually my ex using his son's name. I had to admit, the baby was pretty cute. The wife seemed like a nice person. Wasn't I supposed to be hate-mode? Nah. 

The thing is this - we didn't end on bad terms. We used to be best friends. Of all of the relationships I had, he was the one I wanted to work out most. It didn't because of one thing: religion. He was Muslim, and I was Catholic. He went out of state for medical school. I just started my first job out of law school. He wanted me to move with him and take the next step. I wanted to take the next step, too, but he wanted the next step with one condition: conversion. When I refused to convert, then we talked about how we could raise our future kids. He was adamant about blocking out Catholic teaching and making it only Muslim teaching. In religion, there was no middle ground with him. I wasn't opposed to introducing Muslim teaching, but I was adamant about including Catholic teaching. These were issues that didn't come up until our relationship hit this breaking point. Everything we had ever talked about and agreed upon had changed. When our foundation changed, the relationship crumbled. 

We didn't speak for months. I was upset because I felt like he went back on his word - he was supposed to accept me "as is," beliefs and all. There were a few other issues that were associated with a long-distance relationship that I held against him - like forgetting to call me on my birthday. Eventually, I forgave him. When he called me again to see how I was, our friendship came back. 

We stayed friends until he got engaged. We haven't spoken in two years. Here he is again, with a friend request, masquerading as a 1 year old baby. 

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