Let me tell you about "Billy." The name has been changed to protect the not-so-innocent.
I met Billy on a dating site called Plenty of Fish (POF). You may have heard of this notorious site. POF has been known to many to be filled with the good, the bad, the scary, and the flaky. Tonight, I got stood up by one of the flaky.
Billy was not quite a desirable specimen for a few reasons. I came across his profile last week. POF has a feature that allows members to see who has viewed his or her profile. I did not message Billy because of his photos, his lack of formal education, and his geographic location, but he was alerted that I viewed his profile.
Above, I have posted a photo of Billy. He said he was 35, but judging from the facial features, he appeared to be in his early 40s. Would a man lie about his age to sleep with a younger woman? You can bet your ass he would! In fact, it's happened to me before a few years ago with a man who claimed to be 37 but actually was 42.
Next, he has only a high school education. I'm not a snob, but if I went through the trouble of going to law school, I would like to be with a man who at least goes to the trouble of getting a bachelors degree. I have this standard for two reasons. The first reason is that a higher education usually means a better job, which means a higher income. I don't want to attract a leech who sees "LAWYER" and thinks I'm going to be his sugar mama. The second reason is that a higher education usually means the person is more likely to possess class. When I say class, I mean he's not a redneck. He has some formal education as well as "real life" education, wit, a sense of humor, a good demeanor, and manners. He knows how to be subtle, and he knows the value of success combined with humbleness.
Lastly, he is located in another city, with the promise that he is moving to my city. This promise of a move may or may not be true, but in general, I don't trust non-locals. People who travel frequently to my city for work are more prone to be deceptive because if the person is never around, then he has a lower likelihood of getting caught hounding around town. Anyone in that in-between stage tends to be questionable. I find that non-locals will insist on meeting in the hopes of getting a woman liquored up enough to get her in bed. Now, if the female's intention is just to have a night of fun with no strings attached, a non-local is a great deal. The only other problem is making sure the man isn't married.
After viewing Billy's profile and ruling him out for all of the aforementioned reasons, he promptly messaged me. Not wanting to be rude, since his initial message wasn't terrible, I gave a brief response, but one that was not a complete invitation for further contact. He kept on, and we engaged in a tennis match of messages that culminated into a request for my cell phone number.
We spoke on the phone twice. The first time, he slightly irritated me. He was a little bit too Seinfeld for me. Jerry Seinfeld, in the show, cracks a lot of one liners, and the audience laughs. Imagine having this in real life, and the man is his own laugh track. That's what this guy was like. He otherwise seemed to have the same values as I did. He had a respect for other people's time, appeared to be ready to settle down, wanted kids, and wasn't into head games. I thought to myself, "Okay, I'll give this guy a shot." Yesterday was our second phone conversation, and it was meant to serve as a confirmation of tonight's plans. A time was selected with the promise that he would contact me again to select a place of his choosing.
Today was radio silence. I didn't hear from him until a half hour past the agreed meeting time. Here's how the conversation went:
"Oh man I am so sorry. I just got out of work. I know it's kind of late. But, would you still like to meet?"
"Uh..."
"I guess that's a no."
"Not really."
"Well, that's okay. I mean, I know I should have texted. I'm sorry. I should have taken five minutes today to text you and let you know. But hey! Maybe we can meet another time? What are your plans tomorrow or Thursday?"
"I have plans already." (I legitimately do).
"Oh okay. Well, next week?"
"Sure."
"Okay, have a great night!"
"You, too!"
Now, this little exchange should be raising red flags. First, this is a man who is an advanced dater. He has read the books. How do I know? He immediately admitted his wrong and how he could have corrected it. He believed his simple mea culpa would get him off the hook for not contacting me at all today. The man knew what he did was wrong. He knew it when I talked to him, and he knew it 8 hours ago. By immediately admitting his wrong, he thought he could appease me and get another shot. This only heightens his guilt and crap level.
The bottom line is this: if a person has enough time to take a shit, then that same person has enough time to send a quick text message. Plain and simple.
No excuses.
Unless, of course, there is a national disaster, someone dies, or one's car explodes... then that might be a good excuse.
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